Aug 15, 2011

Older Child Adoption: For Me

The Hero and I were kidless when we brought home The Angel and The Dinosaur.

Our agency made us watch a lot of videos about parenting.

We had a lot of conversations with experts, adoptive parents and our family about "older" kids.

In the adoption community, "older" is defined as older than three years.

We had even more discussions about adopting two kids at a time.

The literature says that adopting a sibling set is extremely challenging.

They were right.

Many people tried to deter us from the boxes marked "older" and "sibling".

The adoption community has had some terrible stories.

And I felt at times we only heard the terrible.

We were told that our children would have to be with us as much time as we were apart to

properly attach to us.

While this is a great guidepost to follow,

it was not our story.

I believed that from the beginning of time God hand picked me to mother

The Angel and The Dinosaur.

There are days, I question His sanity.

I don't feel worthy to parent them at all.

I can truly tell you that The Angel is number 1 in the biggest heroes in my life.

Her story is tragic.

But she'll never tell you.

She's too busy smiling and breathing in life one inhale and exhale at a time.

It's why I think she's beautiful.

Not just her bouncy curls,

killer smile or curvy frame.

It's the way her driving spirit wakes her up every day.

Praying for a bigger house so that God will give us more kids.

Begging me to have a garage sale so the $ from her lemonade stand can "feed some kids".

Telling me that I'm better than coffee. (it's own blog post.)

And making us all laugh hysterically.

She will take on anything and will be ready for whatever plunge our family makes.

As long as we make it together.

(that's really she and I, holding hands and laughing our heads off.)

While I never question any one's choice of age when they are adopting.
It truly is an issue of your family's directive and spending ample time in prayer.
But all I can tell you about my "older" child,
Is that she is for me.
And while there is so much of her life that I missed,
I know He is glorified in it all.

Angel, you have the spirit of an eagle and the fight of a tiger.
Watching over you on this earth is an honor and I do not take it lightly.
Thank you Jesus for her Daddy and I are grateful~we are just not deserving.
But I am so glad that she's for me.


Nikki said...

Over the top, absolutely beautiful my friend. I love you.

Meggan Lambesis said...

so beautiful. thanks for sharing.

Courtney said...

Thank you for this. Everyone questions our sanity as well. . . but God's plans are perfect.

cal+claire said...


Alison said...

So sweet! She is beautiful! SO glad that God chose her for your family!

Amanda Purvis said...

You are a wonderful writer. I too agree, we have been blessed by our "older child" and can't imagine God picking us anyone else!

Erin Moore said...

Thank you for writing this. I too, have heard so many horror stories about older child adoption - yet God lead me to an older boy. Social workers warn us and look skeptically at us - but it's what we're going to do. He's already ours. His stuff is our stuff. May God be glorified through it all!