One Week Waiting...and Orphans

Today marks one week of being on the waitlist! I know that it is completely ridiculous to be expecting a call already, but I can't stop daydreaming about it. I daydream about where I will be, what time of day it will occur and how fast I can make it to Le. I know that somewhere tonight, thousands of miles away, a child(ren) is getting up for their day and deep in their
heart(s) is the desire for a family. And little do they know that such a family exists, believes in them, prays for them, longs to be with them, sheds tears for them and shouts praises to the Father for them. And at THIS moment there are two people in Oklahoma who are totally incomplete without them...

I love to argue and debate. That's why I am good at my job. My dad always told me that if I was going to be likened to a disciple of Jesus I would have to be like Simon Peter, because I would cut off your ear if you messed with my Jesus. However, watching the trailer for the new movie from Warner Bros, Orphan, doesn't make me want to argue, it makes me want to slap a movie producer. The tag line of the movie is that you can't love a child that isn't your own. Well, I have news for WB, not only do I love a child that isn't biologically mine, but I pray for, sing to, and talk about a child(ren) that I haven't even met yet and my heart yearns for them, hurts for them and loves them. In fact, I love ALL of the orphans in this world, because it is biblical, they have needs and I know that there are many families who are opening their hearts and arms to orphans all over the world. I encourage you all who read this blog to not only boycott this movie but also blog about it, pray about it and talk about it, because orphans don't need one more challenge in life, they need someone to speak up for them and bring them into homes, families, and hope for a future.
My darling children, you may be labeled by this world as an "orphan", but there is a family that is dreaming of your face, prepping your room and telling everyone they meet that YOU are so much more than an orphan...you are our world!

6 Years Ago

I'm a dork. I've always known this about myself and over the years Le continues to remind me. I've accepted it. I think he has too. One indication of my dorkiness is that I've always celebrated the anniversary of Le and I's first date. We had travelled to see John Mayer perform outside at the Smirnoff Center in Dallas. And as we sat there, on a blanket swaying to the music and talking, I looked down and my heart was gone. It had come to rest with him and I knew I would never get it back. I knew he was the one I had been praying about and God had seen fit to answer my prayer. That was six years ago today! Happy Anniversary sweetheart!

WAITLISTED!!!!

Guess who is on the waitlist? We got our email about twenty minutes ago! We are waiting for either a boy or girl between 0-3years or siblings under the age of 6!
Thank you Jesus for this wonderful gift...especially on a Monday! We are so excited and can't believe we are on the last leg before we get to meet our children.

All About the YEAH!!!

There have been so many moments in this adoption that have been full of "Awww" moments. The ones where your heart sinks and you feel lost, helpless and sad. On those days, I need to cry, hold Le tighter and spend more time online with my adoption friends who understand what it is that is making me crazy. Today was NOT one of those days. I work about two miles from my office. Ever since Le and I went last week for our CIS fingerprint appointment, I have driven home on my lunch break to check my mail, in the hopes that our approval letter is in the mail. I know...I am OCD and I can't help it. I had a court hearing today out of my county and I was training an intern in our office. I knew I was running late but I couldn't shake the urge to drive by my house and just look. As I pulled into the driveway and yanked open the mailbox expecting to find nothing, but inside was our CIS approval letter! I burst into tears. I tried to explain to my intern all the emotions I felt, but I fell horribly short. And as I was crying, frantically dialing Le, "You Are Being Loved" by Steven Curtis Chapman (the song I daily sing to my children) starting singing from my CD player and I cried all the harder. Today was one of those moments, however brief, that I was closer to my children and I could say "Mommy and Daddy are on their way". YEAH... waitlist, I can see you in my sights.

Just Another Reminder

Sunday was amazing. We spent the day with our niece and nephew and we drove down to my parent's house to spend the entire day playing in their pool. We had found a puppy several weekends ago and had put up signs all over the neighborhood and on craigslist but no one ever claimed her and my parents said they would take her if no one wanted her. My dad named her Chelsie. Chelsie had as much fun swimming in the pool as the rest of us. I wish I had taken a picture. It was too cute. That night when we tucked the kids into bed, Le read them the story of Daniel in the Lion's Den. But I couldn't shake the feeling all day that there was something missing. And then I reminded myself that it wasn't something, but someone(s).
I know to some who know me, I may sound crazy, but I miss my children. I talk about them all the time and I know that people just stare and me and think "oh, isn't she cute, she's lost her mind." I have not met them but I yearn to even though I know my Heavenly Father has already seen their faces, knows their names and has counted every hair on each of their heads. I cry over the most ridiculous of circumstances (Le will tell you this is NOT new) and I find myself envisioning them like a mirage in the desert. I saw them in the pool all day on Sunday, swimming, laughing, playing. I pray for them constantly and at least one time a day, I play "You Are Being Loved" by Steven Curtis Chapman and I sing to them (this only occurs when I am alone, as I spent the $ my parents set aside for singing lessons). I know there are several of them. Even though we may receive a referral for one this time, I know that travelling to Africa must be couched in the plural...because my childREN are there. And they need us. And I am coming...I am already there. I cherish souls that I have never met and a land that appears only through other's pictures and my dreams, but I am there. Walking through the desert, searching the faces of every street child I meet in my sleep, asking only one question: "Are you my child?" We will know soon enough, but soon enough never seems to arrive fast enough.
Thank you Father that you are watching over my children now and every other child who needs an earthly home. And thank you Le, for knowing exactly what it means when I say "I just need to cry."

Slap In The Face.

I watched this video several weeks ago when a friend played it for me. I was almost in consolable after I finished watching it. Obviously the boy at the end of the video spoke to me a lot. It is so hard for me to watch kids suffering, but knowing that one or more of those children belong to Le and I just makes the ache that much more deep. And then I have to remind myself of how selfish I am. All of us, no matter where we live, belong to God and how His heart must be breaking all of the time...for each and every one of His children who are hurting.

God forgive me for too long ignoring the suffering of others. I know that Your heart breaks for them. Thank You, for continually breaking mine so that my eyes may be opened.

Next Stop....Wait List!

Today was Le and I's appointment at the Immigration Office here in OKC. It was quick and painless. The next step in the process is that it will take several weeks for Immigration to approve us and once we have the approval, it will need to authenticated. Once authenticated, our documents ("the dossier") will be sent to Ethiopia. And we will be officially on the wait list! Being on the wait list means that our agency will begin searching for a match to our profile and once we have a "match", we will know who are child/ren are going to be!

A Funny Thing Happened....

I was alone again today. Although Le and I were able to spend two great days together without working, today reality returned and he left for the fire station. Don't get me wrong, I love Le's job. He was born to be a fire fighter. He is amazing at what he does and knowing the pride he takes in what he does makes me proud to be his wife. But every third morning when he gets up at the crack of dawn, a small part of my day is already ruined. I know he isn't going to be there, and it sucks. I can't help it. After almost six years together, I would rather spend time doing nothing with him than be anywhere in the world doing anything else (except maybe Africa :) ). Today as I hurried to get ready for church, I couldn't find my car keys. And the more I looked, the more certain I became that they were with Le, in his car, at the fire station, over 30 miles away. Bummer! I thought about calling someone for a ride and then I remembered watching Invisible Children (If you haven't seen it, it will change your life). All of those kids who are threatened by abduction and captured into a rebel army. These kids who travel for miles every night to sleep in the safety of their nearest hospital because there is saftey in numbers. Our church is only a few blocks from home, so out I went. And the more I walked, the more I communed with my Heavenly Father and thanked Him for the reminder that while I was peeved that I was walking three blocks, some where tonight in Uganda, Africa, a child will walk in an attempt to save their own life. Forgive me Father, for I am selfish.